Written Up

Everybody knows how the University of Vermont's alcohol policy really works. Sure there is what the handbook and all that bollocks says which is that UVM is a dry campus and you will be caught by whomever, RA's or cops usually, should you choose to consume alcohol on campus. In reality most RA's run by the same philosophy, we know it happens, just don't be stupid about it and don't force me to write you up. This pretty much entails not leaving your door open, not walking around with alcohol in visible possession and not hosting thirty person pong or dance parties in your shitty forced triple in which ever hall you ended up in.

I have been fortunate enough all semester to avoid subjecting myself to any extreme and blatant stupidity that would result in a citation from the ResLife system. However, one must account for the factor of sheer bad luck before they can assume in gliding through their years on campus without any run ins with the law just on common sense.

Unfortunately, I was subject to such a dose of misfortune this past Saturday evening. After a truly epic Friday night and a plethora of studying and work to do in the coming week, I was taking Saturday easy. I spent most of the early night either jamming with my roommate or watching college football around the hall. Granted there was some drinking taking place but by the hour of eleven, all those truly in pursuit of inebriating themselves had generally vacated the premise.

 At this time my roommate Chris, Joe from down the hall, and myself were all chilling in Joe's room, contemplating what to do with our fairly lazy weekend night. The key fact in this situation is that Joe, who is a sophomore and has a car, has been in the habit of collecting various redeemable bottles every weekend to deposit for a little extra cash each week. This fateful night he had collected three empty 1.5 liter bottles of liquor from various acquaintances to add to his collection of redeemable for the weekend. Sadly these three bottles were straight chilling on the floor and had not yet made their way to the closet with the rest of the collection when Chris and I were vacating the room. As the door was opened allowing us to leave, three RA's were walking by doing their usual rounds. Of course they see the three empty containers, leading to write ups for Chris and I who were walking out of a room, stone cold sober, where no alcohol was being consumed, and Joe, who gets screwed for recycling other peoples shit. 

We were all written up for actively consuming alcohol from a common source. This implies that each of us had put a handle of liquor to our face that night.

One doesn't have to be familiar with the nuances behind the basic forces of Blood-Alcohol levels to question the validity of this assumption.

I am in no way pledging myself to be an angel when it comes to this sort of thing but it does strike me as somewhat ridiculous that all three of us are facing a fine and citations for literally doing nothing other than walk out of a room at the wrong place, at the wrong time. My hearing is on Wednesday, we shall see what happens and I have hope that whomever is calling the shots on this can appreciate the ridiculous nature of the situation for at least Chris and I, Joe may be another story. In any event this serves as an excellent example of the inherent flaws in our University's policy.