Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Sleep Control

Since I was young I have always been a out of control sleeper. Ever since I was a baby I would do strange things when I woke up or while I slept. My out of control sleeping was re-emphasized this weekend on a canoe trip. My friends back home always told me about the ridiculous things that I did and said when I was sleeping, but this is the first incident in Vermont.
First of all back home I did weird things like sleep walking, talking, and the two were usually combined.
One of my friends told me about one instance where I stomped around my basement(and his head) screaming profanities looking for the bathroom, in my own house, while he laid frightened below me. My parents also noted one instance when we were on vacation in Wyoming and they thought I called someone in my sleep just to yell every profanity know to man at this imaginary caller. Every time something like this has happened I already know the people. Even sometimes though with my best of friends my odd sleep habits can be embarrassing. For instance once I woke up with my hands grasping each one of my best friends butt cheeks. Of course it was very surprising to my friend to find my hands on his butt. Still I know him very well and it is hard to really surprise him. Camping this weekend I definitely did not know everyone.
While camping we slept in a row of six under a tarp on the ground. I rolled out from under the tarp three times during the night. All three times it happened to be raining slightly. Waking up three separate times mildly wet was not what I expected. All three times I fondled the girl that was sleeping next to me(in this case above me) legs looking for my flashlight. When the girl woke up to this guy she did not know touching her legs it did not look like I was looking for my flashlight, that was embarrassing to say the least. The worst part I don't even remember, I was just told by the girl that I assaulted. During an obviously deep sleep I rolled on top of the girls legs and stayed there until she eventually woke up because she lost feeling in her legs. She pushed me off and I continued my psychotic slumber. I don't know if these odd sleep habits will ever be a real problem but I will continue to freak people out I do not know while I am gently sleeping.

1 comment:

A Underwood said...

I don't know if you saw Mike Birbigilia when he came here but he is a famous sleepwalker/talker. He finally went to a doctor after he jumped out of second story window.

So I don't know if you want to draw the line at sleeping on girls or not. But at the very least Mike is looking for awesome sleepwalking stories on his website so he can include them in his off-broadway show "Sleepwalk With Me."

Hey you could submit this story or another one and be famous on Broadway

http://www.birbigs.com/